Sigh. Ok, I feel better. But in the end, the 30 minute torture I just endured was completely unnecessary as a simple "reset" solved the problem. Of course, I "resat" 4 times before I called gurgly-breathing, gum smacking Carol at Comcast. Moving on...
Today is "SUMMER HOURS" at work, so I got to pick the kiddos up at lunch time! As a special treat, and because I knew if I didn't, I'd have very fussy boys, we stopped at McDonalds on our way home. After I ordered our meal and got us seated, it dawned on me that this was the first time since becoming a mama of two, that I have ever done lunch in a restaurant without an adult sidekick/referee.
It actually was going somewhat smoothly. As quickly as I could cut Charlie's cheeseburger, he downed them in handfuls. Henry was busy playing with the Happy Meal toy; too taken to actually eat any of his own meal. It becomes obvious when Charlie is done eating because he starts to throw his meal on the floor. Henry just announces "I'm dooonnneee." It's then that I realize that my plastic fork is still in its plastic bag. Sigh. This is when Henry threw a piece or McNugget at me and it stuck in my hair. Oh, he thought this was heeeelarrious, as did his brother, who started squealing as he threw his pieces of hamburger on the floor (I'm sure he was also aiming at my hair). I quickly realize this is going downhill and we need to wrap it up.
This is when Henry announces to all of us (all 5 guests in the restaurant) that "I need to POOP mom!". Oh dear.
For one split second I almost said "Henry, just go in your pull....." No. No...I can do this.
I scramble to throw away our garbage while holding Charlie as Henry is holding his beehind telling me how bad he needs to poop in front of a poor old man trying to eat his lunch.
Luckily (?) the largest stall was open and after I clean off the toilet (WHAT is wrong with people????) Henry starts his business. Why must children brace to the toilet seat as if they might get flushed down the toilet? I begged him to "choose me, not the seat, Henry!"
One point: Henry
Charlie, meanwhile, starts to throw Henry's Happy Meal toy in the toilet behind Henry...but I'm quick, and catch it before disaster strikes.
One point: Mama.
As I am helping Henry, Charlie picks the toilet seat up (ugh.), lands on all fours on the floor, splats his hand in something wet and tries to crawl under the stall door. My field of vision becomes pinhole-like and I start sweating.
Four points: Charlie.
I finally get all 3 of us out of the stall and to the sink, except that everytime I set Charlie down, he wants to crawl (I mean, you are walking little man...why must you crawl in the public bathroom?) It is then, in my public bathroom haze, I decide the best thing to do is to flee this place and just scrub our hands at home; praying the entire way that I don't see any fingers in any mouths. I didn't.
I know, I know....now that I am in my right frame of mind again, I should have washed Henry's hands (and let Charlie do his thing) and then washed Charlie's...but I was sick people, I had to get out of there!
We are home safe, but point-wise, Charlie has Henry and I by a mile. So he got his hands washed twice in hopes of scrubbing away all of the "McNugg-icks".
Love, B
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